i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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