you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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