you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
