dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
