I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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