It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
