I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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