Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
