im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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