Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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