Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
