She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
