matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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