u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize