pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
