Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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