I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
50% drunk capacity currently
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
