Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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