A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
