I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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