Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
