belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
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