i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Houston, we have a squirter
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Randomize