i'm signing you up for texting rehab
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
