i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
It's shark week go big or go home
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Randomize
