Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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