that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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