Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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