Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
