Please, let me fuck your mom
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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