That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
