let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
