Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
