When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
