ugly people sure do ruin things
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
