gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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