Please, let me fuck your mom
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
