THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
