So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Less talking, more tequila
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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