vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Everclear isn't food dammit
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
