sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up�
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
