She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
