Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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