just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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