Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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