dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
