I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Randomize