I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
