I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
