did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
